As I cruised through the subject titles searching for something to write about, I decided to look for a subject that I had experienced personally, hoping that the words would come easily.

After several pages of skimming over titles, it hit me like a ton of bricks. There it was, a subject that I had been dealing with for the last five months, "Grief: coping with the loss of a child". I quickly clicked to the next page as my brain began to have the infamous debate on why I should or should not bother trying to put into words what I had learned about parental grief since the tragic death of my adult son.

I leaned forward in my desk chair as both my legs began to shake like the paint can shaker at the hardware store. I clicked on the next page icon again, hoping that the sinking feeling in my stomach would go away and be replaced with the joy of seeing my son and his family arrive for a long weekend. The familiar stinging tears welled up in my eyes while I returned to the page that contained a request for articles on a subject that I didn't want to admit, I know about first hand.

First of all, as is true with life in general, coping with grief is a process. It is a journey that clearly announces it's onset, but does not come with a map. Everyday is filled with a roller coaster ride of emotions, while we look for someone or thing to make it better and make the hollow emptiness go away.

After months of coping with the death of my son, I have finally reached a place in my journey where I can share with others how I have managed to stay alive and carry on while I am moving through my grieving process:

1. Give hugs and get hugs from anyone who offers and accepts

2. Find someone that you trust and ask them to be with you until you can regroup enough to remember to brush your teeth and change your underwear. Don't worry, the universe will bring the right people to you. You don't even have to talk to that special friend, just let them carry on for you by answering the phone, taking care of banking, and making contact with the rest of the world while you are remembering how to breath in and out.

3. Find a "group" meeting that helps you to feel OK for the moment. It doesn't have to be a grief group per SE, but a supportive loving group that will let you grieve, and will not try to steal your journey from you with all the usual colloquialism. Then clear your schedule and don't let anything stop you from this group meeting.

4. Take

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