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Poetry: Looking in the mirror

I despise the way you make me feel.
Negative, depressive, crushing, hurtful.
You're supposed to show a mirror image,
as I am, exactly, identical, the same.
So why do I find it hard to hold your gaze?
Why do I see a hideous portrayal?
Like a sadistic artist in a bitter rage.
Or a hurtful satirist aimed only at me.
My imperfections are all you show.
Over emphasizing, distorting any way you can.
I despise the way you make me feel.
But I am drawn to look again and again.
You compare me to supermodels.
Perfect, airbrushed, spotless, un-flawed.
My reflection grins and softly whispers.
"You will never look anything like them".
I sometimes look for what seems like hours.
Willing to see a different me.
But the only differences that appear,
make me feel worse, I loathe what I see.
I despise the way you make me feel.
But you have control of me.

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