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Having watched both clients and friends prepare for custody disputes, I have observed both worthwhile and counterproductive strategies. In this article, I offer a few tips based on those observations in the hope that you can use them to best benefit your child.

First, some background to give the strategies listed below some context and to understand the arena you will be battling within. I practice law in Ohio where, in place of "custody", the process is called "allocation of parental rights and responsibilities." No matter what term is used, the goal of the process is the same; to determine what is in the best interest of the child.

Obviously, it is best if you and your spouse can agree on the terms of custody and visitation. If you can, the judge or magistrate assigned to your case is likely to accept that agreement.

If you can't agree, then you are throwing the issues to the court to decide. So, the first thing you should do is make sure you and your spouse understand the implications of your not being able to reach agreement. If your spouse is being unreasonable, it might help to get them to move off their current position and negotiate a little. Explain to your soon-to-be-ex that you are giving the decision to a person (the judge or magistrate) who does not, and cannot possibly, know you, your spouse, or, most importantly, your child to any great extent. Not having such knowledge means that there is a risk that your child's best interests will not be fully realized.

Because of this, Ohio law lists nine factors a court is to consider when determining the child's best interest. However, these are just factors. Different people (i.e. judges/magistrates) will give some factors greater weight than others. These factors include:

The wishes of the parent (which will diverge, if you're still fighting at this point);

The wishes of the child, if the court has interviewed him/her;

The love, affection, and other emotional ties existing between the child, parents, siblings, and others in the child's life;

The child's adjustment to home and school;

The child and parent's mental and physical health;

The parent that is most likely to abide by the court's determination and develop strong ties with the child;

Whether a parent has committed an act of domestic violence or child abuse/neglect;

Whether a parent has or plans on moving outside the state; and

Any other factor the judge decides is relevant.

The last one is a pretty big "catch-all" isn't it?

So, your strategy in preparing for

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