by Tami Beck

Created on: November 08, 2011

In today’s couple-oriented society, being single can often bring a negative stigma and unwarranted stereotyping. Television shows, online social sites, even family and friends, often portray singles as sad and unfulfilled, constantly equating true happiness with having a life partner. The societal pressure frequently colors the life activities of even the most stable singles, sometimes creating a feeling of isolation that arises from being out of the norm. Yet, whether you are single by choice, or just waiting for the right one to come along, it really is possible to be happy as a single person.

To be happy as a single person, you must first learn to focus on your “self” rather than focusing on your singleness. Unattached people often avoid doing things they enjoy, simply because they are single. For instance, some enjoy dining out, but refuse to do so if they have to go alone. After all, it is not the norm to eat out by yourself, especially if you are not at a fast food eatery. A sit-down restaurant can be uncomfortable when you focus on the fact that you are eating alone while others are dining with someone.  But when you focus on the pleasure of the fine food you are eating, and the respite that comes with being served, the fact that you are sitting alone at your table loses its negative implications. When you stop worrying about what others think of you, you can concentrate on the fun of doing the things that bring you enjoyment. 

Another way to find happiness as a single person is to be content in the “now” moment of life. Do not let thoughts of “if only” cloud your joy in the present moment. When you start to think “if only I had someone special, I would be so happy”, replace that thought with “I am happy now, by myself”. You do not have to deny wanting a relationship, or stop hoping to meet that special person. You just have to realize that right now your life is complete even if you do not have a life partner. Always embrace the things that you do have, rather than lamenting what you do not have. Stay active and pursue the things that interest you right now, rather than waiting and wishing for someone to do those things with. Focusing on the present is paramount to your happiness as a single person.

Being alone does not have to mean a life of unhappiness. Your independent lifestyle simply gives you a wider range of choices than your married counterparts. When you want to stay out late, or stay in for a leisurely evening, you can just do it, since you only have yourself to answer to. Companionship comes in a variety of ways, and you do not have to be paired off to enjoy all that life has to offer. When you value the choices that being single can offer, rather than envy those who are part of a couple, you open the door to happiness and satisfaction in your life as a single person.

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