How do you define leadership? Is it a quality that everyone has? Or that everyone is capable of having?

Many times when I was a military, I heard comments such as "He's a perpetual E-3", "He'll top out at E-6", "He's being groomed for command", "Someday, he'll have his stars". However, what exactly were they talking about?

Was it a sense of leadership qualities? or in some cases, the lack of leadership qualities?

Or is it an innate sense that certain personalities have a tendency to lead, while others don't.

I personally feel that the best leaders are also the best followers, yet I also feel that the best followers have the capacity to lead, but by their personality, opt not to lead unless noone else steps up to take the mantle.

As such, should we be trying to push our children into leadership roles? Of course we should. But what if they don't want the role?

Every child has his or her own personality, and though we as parents wish that we could control that personality, I believe that it is better to teach people to live within their capabilities and their personalities, rather than trying to force them to conform to what our own goals are for them.

We should be exhorting our children to grow into mature adults, while also realizing that they are not simply adults not yet fully grown.

We should be teaching them to work together first as a team, and let the people who have the natural leadership personalities sort it out.

Learn more about this author, Alan Fernald.
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