by Jessica Steele

Created on: August 20, 2011

Confidence is one of the most important factors in creating a happy, healthy, well-adjusted individual. It is certainly crucial for lasting success. Most people have never been taught how to foster confidence in a child, but it is quite simple and with some very small lifestyle decisions, you can easily raise a child who is confident of himself, and able to trust their ability to make good decisions. Fostering confidence in a child also gives them an opportunity to learn better communication skills and to identify their abilities and weaknesses more effectively. Not only will a confident child know that they can do what they set their mind to, they will also be more comfortable with their own limitations and understanding that we all have strengths and weaknesses, and rather than beating themselves up over what they can’t do, they will focus on what they can do.   

Everyone has a basic need to be validated, including, and maybe especially, children. When they are hurt or scared, you can assure them that it will be ok, but don’t forget to first tell them that you understand why they are upset. Validate whatever issue is causing they emotion. “Oh my, that scrape on your knee must have hurt very badly. I can understand why that would make you sad. Let’s go clean it up so it can start to feel better. Good thing you are a tough kid”. Is your child afraid of the dark? Rather than tell her that there is nothing to be scared of, try validating her fears. “I can understand that you are scared. The dark can be a very scary place, but let’s check in the closet and under the bed together so you can be sure there is nothing there. I will be right down the hall if you need anything, but together we can make sure you are safe”.

You can foster confidence in your child when they are not upset also. Daily routines are a fantastic opportunity to show your child what they are capable of. One simple thing you can do is include them in the household maintenance. Ask your child what side dish they would like with dinner, or let them choose if you will be having green beans or peas with dinner. You can alter this to each child’s individual age. Maybe they can chooses the main dish one night a week, or even help prepare the dinner. As much as children seem to dislike chores, the sense of satisfaction that they receive after helping with dishes, alongside mom or dad, and having a great conversation the whole time, leads

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