by Jake Betz

Created on: August 14, 2011   Last Updated: August 15, 2011

It won’t happen, I know, I shall not ever win.
That was – I counted! – your umpteenth double spin.
You’re a rascal, a jerk, someone who’s not nice
Somehow, some way, you’re messing with the dice.

While you chase ahead, rapidly round the board,
I’m stranded on this stupid space, abandoned and ignored.
Yes, I’ll say it loudly! You’re a lousy stinkin’ cheat.
You’ve even bumped the table with your big fat clumsy feet.

I moved ahead my first turn, my spirits did take heart,
Then you landed right beside me and sent me back to “Start.”
I like polite opponents, you rude insensitive beast;
You misappropriated my luckiest game piece!

You scalawag, you oafish dolt. I’m so mad I could burn,
For while I was distracted, you took an extra turn!
Why do I bother anyway? Do you think that I’m some nut?
Take this game and shove up, right up your silly butt!

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