by Jane Allyson

Created on: August 11, 2011

It can be very hard dealing with a violent teen and many parents cope in the best way that they can, often finding that the situation has taken over the home life and may start affecting other siblings and members of the family.

Often parents will find it difficult seeking help from outside agencies because they feel a sense of misplaced shame about the situation, and will often blame themselves for why their child is behaving the way that they do.

Domestic abuse is often hidden from friends and the extended family too, so it can be very difficult for the parent to set up a support system within their own social circle. This can have the effect of exacerbating the situation, until finally, something happens to bring things to a head.

If you are a parent with a violent teenager and have no idea how to deal with his behavior, then it may be helpful to go right back to when you first noticed something was wrong with him. Children behave badly for a reason, and although it may be hard to face the facts, you may have to take a good hard look at certain events in both you and your child’s life to find out where things started to go wrong.

Firstly, remind yourself that you are not alone. This happens to lots of other families across the world, and it is not uncommon for a teen to become violent. This can be for a number of reasons such as they may be experiencing bullying at school, they may have started to mix with other violent teenagers, such as becoming involved with a gang or they may have become involved in drug or alcohol abuse.

Teens today are under a lot of pressure from school, their peers, the media, and yes, even their parents. It is no wonder that they go off the deep end every so often.

First, talk to a teacher at school. For younger children this will be their class teacher or teaching assistant. Older children could have a favorite teacher who they may have connected with, who would be willing to help, or who may have an idea about what is going on. Often a child can behave badly because they have got behind with work at school, have a fear of being a failure, and may be having trouble making friends or experiencing unwanted attention from other children.

Set consistent boundaries. Be a good role model yourself and encourage respectful exchange in the home. Set realistic expectations for your teen and give rewards when they do well. Children respond well to praise and encouragement, no matter what age they are.

If things do go badly and you experience

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