by Leslie Trotter

Created on: August 09, 2011   Last Updated: August 12, 2011

You want to be accepted by your new stepchildren. However, nothing you can do pleases them. You can  surely expect defiance. Your stepchildren will defy you at every opportunity they get. They will not accept you as an authority figure at first. In fact they may never view you as one.

You can expect rough roads ahead if your husband is not on board with getting his children to be more respectful towards you. If your husband thinks that you are being too hard on his kids or that you are imagining that they are displaying negative behavior towards you, your marriage might be in jeopardy and you should talk to your husband about this before it gets to that point.

There will be times when you will be underminded by your stepchildren when their real mother overrides you on any rules you try to set. These kids will be quick to point out the fact that you're not their mom. and you can expect this to be a problem when they will refuse to do anything you tell them no matter if it is for their own good.

Arguments and fights can possibly break out between you and your stepchildren, and you can expect far worse if your husband jumps in and takes their side over yours. If you find yourself in a marriage and  living in a house with your stepchildren where your husband never sees your side and the stepchildren are continually causing you grief, voice your concerns to your husband. Make sure you two are alone somewhere without the children around.

Suggest a family therapist to help you all sort through your problems. If your husband wants to save his marriage and dwell in a peaceful environment with his wife and children, he will definitely be on board for a family therapist if he loves his family and wants to keep them together.

Giving the benefit of the doubt that your family will start to see eye to eye, you can also expect the possibility that your stepchildren can grow to love you and you can all become the best of friends. Just make sure you don't try to replace their mother. Explain to your stepchildren that you want to be in their lives as a good friend who will be there for them anytime they need you. When they learn that you are someone they can trust and depend on, you will be appreciated.

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