by MC Allen

Created on: August 09, 2011

Being the mother of a son, I understand the sacred bond between mothers and their boys.  With that said, when you marry a boy he will always have a mother who is protective and domineering and maybe even a little judgemental.  The best way to have a good relationship with your mother-in-law is to follow a few simple rules.

1.  Always try to include his mother in major life decisions.  Even if you have talked to your mom first, at least ask his mother for her opinion.  Houses, schools, even paint color questions will prove that you trust her judgement and this will allow you to sneak a few things past her in the future.

2.  If you live in the same town, try to plan weekly dinners.  Make Sunday night Pizza Night (or whatever the mood allows) and spend quality time with your mother-in-law and your husband together.  This will help you to avoid the "stop-overs" or the guilt when the words "we never see you anymore" surface.

3.  Make sure that when you have children, at least one of them is named for your husband's family.  This will please your mother-in-law and allow you to have sole control of any other children's names. 

4.  Avoid telling your mother-in-law too many personal stories.  Your own mother will get her feelings hurt and your mother-in-law will use this to gain control of any given situation. 

5.  In this same vein, always remember that your husband is his mother's son.  Never, ever complain about your husband to his mother.  Ever!  She will always take his side and it just ends making an uncomfortable situation even more awkward. 

Most of the time mother-in-laws and daughter-in-laws can coexist and even have a friendly relationship.  Just remember that you will never be good enough for her "little" boy and that the only revenge that you will ever have is knowing that you can carry on the tradition when your own son grows up.  Boys love their mothers and when their mothers realize that they might not be number 1 anymore, we (the wives) must tread lightly.  Give them grandchildren as quickly as possible and allow them to spoil the children.  This way at least you get free babysitting out of the whole situation. 

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