by Elspeth Raisbeck

Created on: August 06, 2011

At the dawn of the race for a fuel-efficient car, the first hybrid car was born.  The manufacturer's ad had the strap line 'Or is a Bore', underlining their belief that having an electric OR petrol engine wasn't good enough.  The hybrid had both so 'AND' is better the better choice.

How true this is.  For example, anyone who's thought about the phrase 'you can't have your cake and eat it' will know how silly it is - after all, what's the point in having cake if you can't eat it as well?!

Sometimes having both this and that really doesn't work because the 2 are mutually exclusive, dangerous or illegal.  For example, if you can't choose between the blue dress and the brown suit for work then wearing both at once isn't going to be a good look.  Watching TV and reading a book means that you're not doing either properly (experts are saying that multitasking beyond breathing and walking at the same time is a myth). Driving while using a mobile phone: illegal in some countries and dangerous wherever you are.

But if the choices aren't dangerous, illegal or a fashion disaster, and could be used together, why don't we say 'I'll have both' more often?

We learn from our peers, parents, teachers and TV how to think and behave, hopefully most of the time, pushing us to conform to what's socially 'normal'.

> Many years ago women made a choice between marriage or a career; as time went on a mother didn't go out to work but now mothers can have a family and a career.

> At a restaurant, have you ever felt the anguish of having to decide between the profiteroles and the apple pie?  Is it social pressure that stops you from saying 'I'll have both'?  Well ask yourself if there's an even better reason to have both.

> When social media sites were first making their case for being the best, we held the argument Facebook or Myspace? Twitter or Facebook? Twitter or Diggit?  The clear thinking people see the merrits of each and have both/all of them if it serves their purpose, so why choose?

> Are you a Bourne or Bond person?  They're both great action heroes so why choose between them?

When we replace 'or' with 'and' we may cause a few raised eyebrows and we may need to find a way to make both work - just as the early manufacturer of the hybrid car did for electric and petrol energy. This can mean compromise but compromise needn't be a negative thing.  It means taking the best of one thing and combining it with the best of another and getting results that are better than either on its own.  Compromise can mean progress.

AND is a little word that can give great results, if we'll only stop to work out how to use it a bit more often.

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