by Jennifer Defrates

Created on: July 30, 2011   Last Updated: July 31, 2011

Yesterday, I walked through Walmart getting some strange stares from people as I conversed with my very young (14 months) and clearly non-verbal daughter. What got me the strange looks wasn't that I was talking to her, but that I was talking to her as if we were having a conversation - and we were. What looked to others like just baby play was actually her using sign language to talk to me. Her signs are babyish, just like her speech would be, but she was able to ask me for a balloon when we walked past the party decorations and beg me for crackers as we passed the Goldfish display. She should start being able to talk soon, but as a preemie and a generally quiet kid, her words may not catch up with her signing for quite some time. And I don't have to wait to know what she needs or wants because she can tell me.

Last night she woke up crying at 5 a.m. I rushed into her room to see what was the matter. She signed that she needed her diaper changed, so I did that. When I went to put her back to sleep, she signed "eat", so I gave her a few ounces of milk. Within 10 minutes, we were both back to sleep. If this sounds miraculous, it isn't, but it certainly feels like it if you have ever looked into the face of your screaming infant and wished he could tell you what he needs. You've burped him, swaddled him, fed him, and sang to him and he is just not having it. I've been there, and for the first few months it is guess work. But it doesn't have to stay that way.

A few years ago I wrote another article on this subject because I had always planned to use sign language with my children if I ever had the chance. But this year, I got to find out if it would really work. I started signing to her while feeding her at around five months. I used the sign "more" every time I gave her more to eat. At this stage, she needed to learn what the word meant as well as the sign. I repeated this every meal for weeks. Then I started using her hands to do the sign and then giving her more. I also started signing "finished" around this time period. I figured these were the two signs that would come in handiest first and were the easiest for her to learn. She saw immediately that when she brought her hands together, she got more to eat and when she pulled them apart and waved them a little bit, she was able to stop eating and get down. If you don't know sign language, you can use websites like signingsavvy.com which demonstrate signs, or buy a baby sign language book.

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