by Logan Andrear

Created on: March 19, 2007   Last Updated: April 23, 2007

Are they flirting with me or do I have some food stuck in my teeth? Am I boring her with my stories or is she really intrigued by how I beat the third level of Super Virtual Fighter? Is he really concerned with my feelings or has he just dozed off with his eyes still open?

In the maelstrom of crowded bars and loud dance clubs it can be difficult to identify flirting behavior. Heck, it can be difficult if it happens in a grocery store, church, or even at work. And the rules are different for men and women.

Here is a guide for navigating the wild ride that is flirting.

FOR GUYS:
If a girl continues to make eye contact with you through a crowded bar it may be flirting. It may also be her defense mechanism kicking in because some weird guy won't stop staring at her. Regardless, it's worth a second look so approach her for a casual conversation. Approach cautiously and don't sneak up on her - that may trigger another defense mechanism known as knee-to-the-groin. When approaching take careful notice of her facial expression. A warm smile may indicate her eye contact was, in fact, flirting. If instead her eyes grow wide and she grabs the hand of a friend then you were creeping her out. All is not lost. Continue with an attempt at conversation. Regardless of her facial expression it may be a keen move to concede you are not good at reading women. If she agrees with you it is her way of telling you to leave. All is lost. Leave. If, on the other hand, she giggles, continues to smile, or touches your arm in a reassuring manner she is in full fledged flirt mode. At this point it is safe to assume all future body movement, eye contact, hair twirling, and giggling is flirting. Great job.

FOR GIRLS:
If a guy continues to make eye contact with you through a crowded bar he is definitely flirting. If he is not making eye contact with you it is only because he is trying to make eye contact with another girl. If he knows you are trying to make eye contact with him he will happily reciprocate your eye contact. Simply move into his line of sight and flirting can commence. If you are unable to move into his line of site approach him for a conversation. When you approach, say 'hi'. If he says 'hi' back he is definitely flirting. If he does not say 'hi' back it is only because he couldn't hear you. Say it again until he hears you. Once he hears you he will say 'hi' which is definitely flirting. Great job.

While recognizing flirting can be difficult and dangerous it is absolutely necessary for the survival of our species. So if someone mistakes your actions for flirting please understand they are only trying to save mankind. Hopefully these guides will assist you in your quest.

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