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A divorced man is walking along the beach when he stumbles across what appears to be a tea kettle lying in the sand. He picks it up, wipes it off and *poof* out pops a genie.

The genie makes small talk at first and then asks is he's married. The guy begins telling him the story of his divorce and how she got half of everything. The genie stops him halfway through his story and tells him " Ya' know about genies; we grant wishes blah blah blah and all that sort?" The man answers "of course I know that!" The genie continues "Well, what they don't tell you; in your case, being divorced, I am required to grant you your wish with the following caveat: your ex-wife will receive double or twice what you receive." The genie then asks him if he still wants the three wishes. The guy says "Of course!"

For his first wish, he wished for 10 billion dollars. The genie begrudgingly gives him the money and reminds him that his ex-wife would get 20 billion dollars and asks if he's sure that's what he wanted.

For his second wish, he wished for a vacation home in the most posh location on all 7 continents. Again, the genie reminds him of the caveat and grants his wish.

The guy pauses and asks the genie "Did you say that my ex-wife gets double of what I get?" The genie responds with sarcasm "You didn't understand that? Yes, she get's double, or twice what you get. Now think carefully about your last wish, you already gave her 20 billion dollars and 2 vacation homes in the most posh locations on all 7 continents!"

The guy says, "For my last wish...genie.. I wish you'd beat me HALF to DEATH!"

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