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by Teresa Meakin

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Children start to pick up on their parents emotions, from the very beginning, whilst in the mothers womb. If a woman who is pregnant, gets very emotional, upset, or angry, the baby senses, the mothers feelings, so really in theory, they are learning and growing through our emotions from day 1. If the mother is happy throughout her pregnancy, and doesnt suffer any emotional upsets, you will find, that when the baby is born, it is quite happy and contented, feeds, and sleeps well.
If the mother goes through a very traumatic pregnancy or birth, this can make the baby quite restless, and may suffer emotional problems growing up, because they felt insecure inside the womb, thats why relaxation classes, and antenatal classes are important, throughout the pregnancy.

Young children need to feel safe, and nurtured from birth onwards, to grow and function in a healthy way. If you have 2 parents who are constantly arguing, this is going to make the child feel insecure, and the more they are in that sort of environment, the more they pick up on their parents emotions. They could possibly grow up thinking that its ok to argue, its ok to shout and rant and rave at each other, because thats what they are used too, they think its the norm. The same goes for parents who swear in front of their children, they may not realize it at the time, that what they are doing, is teaching them another language, that they don't need to hear, it can get them into all sorts of trouble, at school, at their friends houses, everything we do around our children, they pick up on, they don't understand, they are still learning and growing.

So if you where out shopping in your local supermarket, and your child starts to have a tantrum, and starts swearing at you, whose fault is it? yes its yours, they are only copying of you. Then you wonder why everyone is looking at you in disgrace,
you automatically, shout at your child for swearing, when in reality, its only what you have taught them. So the best thing to do is don't swear, shout or scream in front of your children, they have plenty of years to grow up, and learn them kind of emotions in adult life. It just looks bad. Also what about when your child grows up into their teens, and you have an argument with one of them, and they turn round to you, and swear at you, whose fault is that? its only how they have been bought up.

Then there's the parents who never argue and shout in front of their children, yes they may argue and swear at each other, but out of the way of their children, because they know its bad, to show these sorts of emotions in front of them.
They teach them respect for each other, for their parents, grandparents, friends and so on. Teach your child, manners, they will eventually, learn right from wrong.
If a parent is upset for some reason, and the child is very close to them, the child picks up on these emotions, they can grow up to be very caring and supportive later on in life. My sons know when I'm upset, they sense it, they always come up to me wrap their arms around me and give me a cuddle, and ask if I'm alright.
If a parent is angry all the time, they pick up on that too, they may feel fear of going anywhere near you, or they may turn into very angry disturbed children.

If a child is bought up, in a happy loving home, and are taught right from wrong, they will also learn to pick these emotions up through their friends also, they will learn to be supportive to them, and anyone else they are close to they will learn, to comfort someone when the situation arises.

Emotions can be a very powerful thing, it can be a very rewarding experience and a very traumatic experience for all involved. So the rule is Don't argue, rant and rave, swear and curse in front of your children, they will copy what they see or hear. Try to be loving, caring and supportive to everyone, keep the bad emotions behind closed doors out of the way of your children.

For someone who is pregnant or planning a family, be happy through out the pregnancy, play soft relaxing music, keep calm, because your baby picks up these emotions, from day 1. Have respect for your children, by not showing bad tempered feelings, or language in front of them, they will learn to give you that respect back. Be loving and supportive, teach them well about whats right and wrong, it will make the world a better place for everyone involved. Their intelligence will mature, healthily, something you can be proud of.

Learn more about this author, Teresa Meakin.

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