by David Braybrooke

Created on: March 17, 2007   Last Updated: September 23, 2010

To flirt with authenticity and great effectiveness it is firstly important to be supremely comfortable with who you are.  Essentially you must woo yourself first and create a persona that appeals and delights and meets with the approval of your finest sensibilities.  In other words, fall in love with yourself first, without being egotistical about it, and the whole world will follow suit.  Practise flirting in the mirror if needs be in order to brush up on your smooth moves and most enchanting winks.

It is no secret really that the art of successful flirting (and it is an art-form, make no mistake!) boils down to good timing and a sincere touch.  It requires a certain balance to effectively pull off.  One must intuitively sense how to approach others and take care to tease and delight in an appropriate fashion.  Reading widely on many and varied subjects and learning the essential points that can be used later in conversation is another useful tactic.  It is common knowledge that most people warm to others who share similar tastes to themselves.  Being in-sync and agreeable with another and to demonstrate this subtly and with flair is a surefire flirting strategy!

From a physical perspective, making eye contact and smiling with genuineness are two great flirting tips.  Allow your natural sense of humor to come forward and be as relaxed and comfortable as possible.  Nothing kills flirting like a tense attitude.  To touch another lightly, whether it be on the arm or gently against a leg is another flirting tip that rates highly.  Some care needs to be employed when touching others, especially strangers, yet nothing establishes rapall better than this most sensual of exercises. 

A simple but effective idea, cultivate a passion for living.  Exude joy and show delight in all things and you shall project this happy aura to the world.  The basis of flirting is about attracting others and being appealing to them and there's nothing more attractive and appealing than a joyous person.  An age old rule when associating with others is to make them feel special and appreciated.  Focus on them and their interests and genuinely inquire about their lives and their passions.  Ask questions about what they love most in life and watch how they open up and warm to you.  Mirroring their body language, breathing rhythms (subtly) and speech inflections gains another's interest and attention like no other.  Unconsciously we are attracted to people who seem most like ourselves.

Flirting is most effective when you allow it to flow sincerely from your heart; it certainly isn't about manipulation or taking advantage of others and it should be a playful, healthy, whimsical activity that spices up everyday life.  So go forth my intrepid students and let your natural charms and abilities shine forth in all their splendor and magnificence.  Flirting is all about enjoying the company of others and getting the most out of life; be playful and alive!

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