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Like my son, many children have difficulty transitioning from one activity or situation to the next.

When a child seems "stuck" in the moment and not able to move on to the next thing, realize that what they're doing at that moment, is safe and predictable. It takes critical thinking and analyzing to get from one stage in life to the next.

Validating their feelings is an extremely valuable tool in helping them. Everyone wants to be understood and "heard", even children. It lets them know you're on their side.

Set some time aside before an activity to discuss strategies with your child. Talk about how much time there is for a certain activity, before it even starts. Ask them how they would like you to let them know when the time is approaching to leave or move on to something else. Talk about how they will handle it when it's time to leave and ways you can make it easier. Discuss all the possible issues that may come up and brainstorm ways to cope with them.

It's important to continually connect with your child before the transitioning even begins, either with eye contact, physical touch or a snack. Look for signs that he may need your help with certain situations that may make the transition later on even harder.

Do what you can to make transitions easier for them. Avoid arguments by not giving sudden orders and directions. Before wanting them to transition, go into their "safe zone" (whatever they're doing at the moment) and connect with them, mentally, emotionally and physically. Talk to them about what they're doing or something they truly love. Keep that connection going and take it with you while you both move to the next step.

One thing that helps my son is taking something of his (with him it's his yu-gi-oh cards) to help make the transition easier. Something that makes them feel safe so that it's easier to shift the focus away from anxiety, to something they love to think about.

Look for natural transitions or breaks that may make it easier to leave or move on. It's better to end peacefully after an hour than trying to end during a meltdown after three hours.

Try to give them something to them to look forward to about leaving. If you're leaving to go home, talk about the fantastic things they can do when they get there.

Another thing that helps my son is when I keep the focus on the fun he had and I ask questions while we're moving from one stage to the next. It helps him shift from being upset about leaving to keeping the good feeling with him longer. It's like that saying, "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened".

Ultimately, it's up to you to make transitions as peaceful as possible for your child. Children learn from us and it's our job as parents to help them understand their world and their place in it.

Learn more about this author, Joanne Greco.
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