by Jessi Michaels

Created on: March 04, 2011   Last Updated: March 05, 2011

" I forgive you." How many times have we said these words and actually meant them? How many times have they been said to us? As a young child, many of us were told that forgiveness is simply the "right" thing to do. It makes us the bigger person being able to rise above our feelings.In time, the words become pacifiers with little or no true meaning until they are accompanied by a true understanding of the power behind the concept.

The beauty of true forgiveness is not that it is a supposed end to a problem, but rather a beginning of psychological freedom. It requires a whole lot of energy to lug anger around. In fact, it is so cumbersome, that we often try and bury it  so deeply that we are not even aware it is there. The reality is, whether conscious of it or not; our mind and our body remain acutely aware of its presence. The toll it takes on us both physically and psychologically can be very serious.

When we learn to truly forgive, we learn to let go. It is as much about our liberation as it is another's. We hold a very strong mechanism within us and when used with mindfulness it is a a tool of mass construction. It is a way to rebuild peace, to create  relationships, to move beyond the challenges that were tripping us up along the path of  our life. A sense of heaviness is lifted, making breathing, moving and thinking easier. Peacefulness replaces chaos and order can settle in and eventually be restored.

There are situations in life in which the act of forgiveness may not be possible. There are pains that run so deep that they cannot be healed. However, the ability to remove the burdens we are able to escape from, leave us better able to deal with life's toughest challenges. It also provides the beautiful feeling that comes from being immersed in happiness. Infusion of positive aspects of life requires a place for these seeds to  thrive; removing the excess negatives provides such a place. There can be little doubt of the benefits of such a change.

Forgiveness comes when we are able. In time and through life experience, we may discover that we have been holding ourselves back from happiness. We gain an ability to move beyond. It does not mean, that what happened to cause the pain is now okay, rather, it provides us with an incredible ability to grab back our lives and opens us up to joy.

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