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Reasons for choosing a closed adoption

by Elizabeth Fazakerley

Created on: January 29, 2011   Last Updated: January 30, 2011

There can be many reasons why a closed adoption is the best option. In terms of the biological parents, their circumstances may be improved if the child does not impact on their lives in any way. A young mother for example, may want to put the child, and the circumstances into which it was born, behind her in order to improve her life and make a fresh start. A rape victim also, for her psychological benefit, may want no contact with anything or anyone associated with that incident. A closed adoption affords a better sense of privacy to the mother also.

The child may also benefit from a closed adoption. Often, the knowledge of being adopted can be painful, and they may feel a strong desire to find out who their biological parents are. If they came from a setting with things like drug use prevalent, they may feel worse about themselves, thinking they have a predisposition to those actions. The separation of biological family and child and family can therefore provide protection for the child, so they are not exposed to any kind of dangerous circumstances growing up, as they may have been if they were not adopted. Similarly, the child of a rape victim would be negatively affected by the fact that half of their genes originated from a person guilty of committing rape. Closed adoption therefore, can be beneficial to the child. Any medical predispositions are noted from the biological parents, so the child can be well treated if any conditions do come to light later in life.

Some adoptive parents may choose never to tell the child of their origins, but this may prove difficult if biological parents seek custody at any point. If the adoptive parents do inform the child of their adopted status, they may seek to communicate with their biological parents, which may make their adoptive parents feel pushed away. This in turn, can cause resentment between adoptive parents and the child, as he or she may draw comparisons between the biological and adoptive parents.

Both families, with a closed adoption, may feel a sense of closure, secure in the knowledge that neither can be identified by the other. There are no blurred lines of responsibility for the child, for the biological parents and for the adoptive parents, which leave the adoptive parents and the child with much greater family unity, and allows the biological parents to move on with their lives. 

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