by Darmon Richter

Created on: January 29, 2011

Libraries are cherished as repositories of learning and wisdom, peaceful sanctuaries where patrons can pass the time by immersing themselves in rows upon rows of books. They can also be quite boring. Here’s ten ways to spice up your visit to the library, at the expense of your fellow patrons.

Rearranging the Books

Library patrons are sticklers for order, but why not help to make their lives a little more interesting? Try rearranging the books yourself... perhaps you could sort them by weight, or size. Maybe you could arrange them according to how much you like the cover artwork. Alphabetical filing systems are so last year.

Tasting Books

Want to really get a feel for a book? Then taste it. Take in that musty old paper flavour, and really immerse yourself in the experience. Be careful, though – if your fellow patrons catch you licking books, they are liable to freak out.

Build a Fort

Did you used to enjoy building pretend forts when you were a kid? A library offers the intrepid fort-builder more building blocks than you could ever hope for. Build your fort tall and strong, by piling up great walls of books. You could even incorporate bookshelves, and defend the fort against attack using crossbows made of pencils and rubber bands.

Bring a Packed Lunch

Searching through piles of books can be hungry work… so why not bring a meal? Find yourself a free table, and set up a banquet. Finger food works best, so be sure to pack chicken wings, spare ribs and tacos. Don’t hold back, really enjoy yourself. Nothing expresses satisfaction as well as a good, hearty belch, and if your hands get too greasy, don’t panic – you may not have brought serviettes, but you won’t find yourself short of pages to wipe your hands on.

Use Edible Bookmarks

Bookmarks are a handy way of keeping your place, when reading a long book over several sessions. Don’t panic if you don’t have one, though. Remember that packed lunch you brought along? Food items such as ham and cheese slices make excellent bookmarks, and when you’ve finished, you can eat the evidence. Of course, forgetting to take your edible bookmarks out when you return the books is a guaranteed way to upset your fellow patrons.

Make a Friend

Library patrons often seem a lonely bunch, foraging alone through corridors of silent books. It might be nice to befriend one of them. Pick your target and then follow them about, asking questions about where they come from and what

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