by Gabrielle Schrader

Created on: January 02, 2011

Those pesky parents are hovering over your shoulder once again. This time they are farther away but they have phones, e-mail accounts and in many cases are offering you some form of financial assistance while you are in college. So you can't get rid of them but how do you limit their involvement to make room in your life for the wonders of college? Continue reading and I'll tell you what has worked for me. 

1.) Keep Them Semi-Informed

If you never call your parents, never shoot them an e-mail, then you're almost guaranteed their annoying inquiries whenever you least want to speak with them. Parents find the most inconvenient times to demand your attention. Once a week shoot them an e-mail or a phone call. And tell them things. If you don't they'll ask. And if you don't answer they may be able to hold something against you. It's best if you tell them a few things. They're happy with the information and you- well, you'll be happy because you get to choose what and how much of your life is shared with them.

2.) Let Them Know Your Class Schedule

This has worked wonders for me. My parents are able to see the amount of work I'm doing and feel like they need to give me my space so I can get work done and hang out with my friends. 

3.) Ask Them The Right Questions

Make your parents feel loved and involved by asking them questions and asking them follow-up questions. If your mother says she's taking a new fitness class at the YMCA, when you call her back next ask her, "Hey Mom, how did that fitness class go? Are you going to keep going? Are any of your friends going? What do you think of the instructor?", etc. This lets them know that you still care about them and want to be a part of their life. It makes them less clingy because they don't feel like they have to constantly get you to take an interest in them. Make sure you also ask them about financial questions or anything that will show your greater responsibility. It just reinforces to your parents that you are growing up, maturing, and need to live your own life. They need to give you some room.

I hope that this article has helped you find new ways of dealing with those parentals and has inspired you with some good ideas of your own. Parents can be difficult to deal with at college. Hold your ground as an adult but be respectful and loving. Before you know it, your relationship with them will be in the happy section of your life and you'll be on to significant others and best friends. Best wishes!

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