by Rhonda M.

Created on: July 16, 2005   Last Updated: April 25, 2007

It is important for children of all ages to have friends. Friendships help us learn and develop. It is important that you begin to allow your toddler to make friends and teach them how they should act with those friends. How can you as a parent set the foundation for a happy toddler with friends to occupy their day and time? You must teach them sharing, caring, and to respect those they associate with. This is where knowledge of how to act to form lasting friendships begins.

Children should be allowed to play with children their own age. If you do not have neighbors or family with children around the same age as your own you may need to consider taking the child to functions where children their age will be present or allowing them to attend a pre- school. If a child does not have social interaction they do not understand how to act when they encounter individuals they do not recognize. It is important to give them a bit of freedom to begin developing their own individuality. Encourage them to go over and ask another child to play. This is the beginning of forming or rejecting a new friend.

Once the child is comfortable with other children the art of sharing must be taught. A selfish child will have few children to play with. You should begin teaching the act of sharing as soon as the child encounters other children. Encourage them to allow another child to play with a toy that they are not. Allow the child to play without interference unless they are disobeying a direct order or not sharing with the other children. This allows them to choose how they act in social interactions and with whom they want to socialize. If they do not share or do something that is not allowed then by reprimanding them they learn that that is not acceptable and they should not do it. In sharing it is also very important to teach the child not to take things from other children. Teach them to always ask to play with an item that does not belong to them. This begins the basic foundation of manners.

Teach your child that it is alright to be different. Also encourage them to become friends with children who may be different, shy, lonely, etc. These children may only need approaching to make a life long wonderful friend. Encourage your child to approach the child and share or show them their new toy to break the ice and begin the friendship.

A child needs encouragement to being a process they are not familiar with. It is important to teach your child how to encounter these situations and what they should do in them. Your child will become more comfortable the more they approach new people. Soon they will begin to make friends naturally and on their own. The right lessons taught they will make good choices on their friends. Once the fundamentals are taught a child understands how to act and how they should approach someone new to become friends. The rest is decided by how the person perceives them. Not all attempts will begin a friendship but if not simply encourage the child to move on that not everyone will accept their wonderful friendship. As young children their friendships change often. Teach them to expect that as they age some friends will leave while new ones will enter their lives. As a child's interests and desires change many times so do their friends. In such a case explain to your child they should respect a friends wishes or in their own case of changing to be true to themselves.

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