by Jen M. Hernandez

Created on: December 17, 2010   Last Updated: February 11, 2012

Erik Erikson, a psychoanalyst best known for his theory on social development, labeled the period between 13 and 21 as Identity vs. Role Confusion.  Essentially, during this stage, adolescents struggle to find themselves, and the role they will play in society. Coincidentally, it is also during this time that they begin to care what others think of them, making them extremely impressionable.

Often, teenagers feel that they can’t confide in their parents, and in an effort to find someone who will understand their strife, they will turn to someone closer to them in age. This is the proverbial “blind leading the blind” scenario. Both are lost and impressionable, and may lead one another to poor decision-making. Up to this point, they’ve mimicked their parents’ principles. Though they’ve been told what’s right and wrong, they’ve never had to make that decision for themselves. Unfortunately, life isn’t black and white, and when they stumble upon a grey area, they may be very unclear on how exactly to respond.

Based on my volunteer experience working with adolescents, I’ve learned that alcohol and marijuana have become such “mainstream” substances that most don’t consider either one dangerous or a drug.

Furthermore, I’ve found that adolescents come to abuse substances because they are:

TRYING TO CREATE OR SUSTAIN AN IMAGE: If they want others to perceive them a certain way, they may be convinced to abuse a substance for the sake of keeping up their reputation.

CURIOUS: They want to see what the hype is about.

SELF-MEDICATING: Predominately for low self-esteem. They may find that the high that comes from drinking or doing drugs is better than coping with whatever they’re feeling. The downside is that once the high is over, the negative feelings will return tenfold, and they won’t have learned how to cope constructively.

PHYSICALLY OR MENTALLY RELIANT ON IT: Something that might have started as hopes for creating an impression, curiosity, or a coping method has now become a necessity to get through the day.

When confronting someone with these issues, it’s imperative that you approach your him or her with an open mind, and try to understand what has led them to feeling as though this were their only outlet. Listen to your child. Being upset is understandable, but it’s crucial that he or she understand you are more concerned than you are angry and that you want to help in whatever way possible.

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