by Paul Schingle

Created on: December 02, 2010

Perhaps I'm not in a position to say, since I only grew up with same sex siblings-brothers.  So, having never had sisters, I really don't know how opposite sex siblings attach.  But, I do have nieces and nephews and I've seen and observed the way they relate as opposite sex siblings.  I think it's safe to say that siblings who are of the same gender are probably a little closer than those of opposing sexes.  But, I also think it's safe to say that other factors have more bearing on how close some siblings are or are not.  I think how close two siblings are in age is probably a bigger factor in how close they are than gender is.  There's probably no rule that's set in stone, but my guess is, same sex siblings are a little closer.

I grew up the youngest of four boys.  Having three older brothers was, as in most cases of having siblings, both a blessing and a curse.  In a different way, I also ended my adolescence as, more or less, an only child.  By the time I was in the eighth grade, all my brothers had grown up and left the home.  So, I've known the benefits of having brothers and, to a lesser extent, of having been an only child.  Overall, I'd say that my brothers and I have grown pretty close-to different degrees, depending on which pairing of us you compare.

My guess is, if I'd grown up with sisters, we would have ended up being fairly close as well, but in different ways.  With brothers, I feel there is nothing that we can't say to each other-good or bad-racy or not.  As adults, that would also probably be true if I had sisters, but probably not so during our growing up phase.  To my other point, though, if you were to pair up my three brothers and me into every two person combination, my two middle brothers grew up the closest.  They were also the closest in age-less than two years apart.  Interestingly, now that we're adults, I believe that my oldest brother and I are probably the closest pairing of the bunch.  And, we're nine years apart.  Like I said, there's no hard and fast rule.

All three of my brothers fathered two children.  All three had exactly one boy and one girl.  In all three cases, the boy is the older.  (I, myself, only have a son-all grown up).  Having watched all three pairings of opposite gender siblings grow up, I can see that they are very close as well.  But, I have seen their closeness change as they've all become adults.  As kids, they would taunt, tease and (playfully) abuse each other.  Now, they relate to each other as adults and are close in different ways.  All three pairings are close in age (none more than three years apart).  Also, the fact that each one has exactly one sibling matters, I think.  Closeness among siblings has a lot of factors including, but not solely related to, gender.

Are same sex siblings closer than opposite sex siblings?  I think the short answer to the question is yes.  But, I also believe that there are a number of other factors (age, number in family, etc.) that affect how close any two siblings are to one another. 

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