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Humor: Dealing with squirrels

by Dolores Zombory

Created on: November 07, 2010

After living and driving in the Sierra foothill for almost 10 years now, my motto is "I don't brake for squirrels, it just confuses them!"  Anyone who lives out here knows that I don't intend to harm or kill.   It is better to keep on driving when one sees a squirrel in the middle of the road.  I have tried to slow down, or even worse, stop.  The squirrel turns to the left, turns to the right, puts it's left foot out and shakes it all about and by the time you think the critter is out of the way and you start rolling again, it's actually under your wheel and you realize you just flattened another one for the turkey hawks to clean up (circle of life!).  When I keep driving towards a live one, the rodent knows I'm serious and runs for it's life and stays away- no confusion for the squirrel, no guilt for the driver.

Why I have bothered sparing the lives of these most animated of forest dwellers is more for the comfort of my own conscious than any love of squirrel behavior.  When I first came to live out in the woods I fell in love with all the wild animals that came around.  Sassy Stellars Jays, graceful deer, mischievous raccoons and clownish squirrels all made their way through my family's yard at some point during the year.  When I would hear coworkers complain about the jays being a pain or referring to the "damned deer" I thought they were just jaded and didn't appreciate the beauty of nature after living in it for so long.  Eventually I would end up crossing squirrels off my list of beloved wildlife list for a few reasons. 

These active critters are skilled at chasing away rare visiting birds.  Squirrels want to be the number one performer in your yard, as well at the number one consumer of any bird seed put out.  Yes, it's entertaining to see a squirrel stretching and straining with all its strength to get to a bird feeder that has been engineered to block squirrel access, but it's also sad to see the numbers of sweet-natured visiting black-headed grosbeaks diminish each year as they search out yards with more feed and less harassment.  It's not just other wildlife that gets annoyed by squirrels.  I even have seen squirrels in my friend's yard in Thousand Oaks pick and drop oranges on her unsuspecting Golden Labrador Retriever,  like something out of an old cartoon.

Then there is the potential damage to one's home.  I don't have personal experience

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