by Awais Choudhry

Created on: November 03, 2010   Last Updated: November 07, 2010

I sit here alone on this bench in the park surrounded by a thousand leaves lying on the ground. Sitting here all by myself makes me feel like a wanderer; a lost soul amidst the scarred memories that will remain with me at all times. When I gaze upon the dead leaves, I see my life scattered all over around me. Each leaf seems like a fragment or an episode left open for me to reflect upon and consider the alternatives that could or should have been. And in doing so, I am consumed by the overwhelming sensation of grief and despair. Looking back I find that my dreams gave me hope but when unfulfilled, they gave sorrow and regret. What a strange dilemma man puts himself into. One often needs inspiration or the will to carry on the burdens of life. And from where one finds that, is all up to him. This finite journey is filled with tears and bloom. Yet you can never experience one too often than the other. In the end, all that remains are your memories. And are my memories dead like the many leaves encompassing me? Alas! They can never cease to exist. So long as I remain, my past lingers on deep inside of me. I am not like the trees that have shed their selves into the eternal oblivion. They have seen and bore much more than I could possibly imagine and yet, how easily they can forget. What am I compared to these grand figures of contentment. As I sit lamenting, a rush of wind sweeps across me and I see the stacked leaves fleeing away as though in a hurry to reach an important destination. And where could these dead be destined for? Pondering over the endless series of thoughts, I am struck by a notion of reality which I had completely ignored. It is clear that the cycle of nature moves on, as it always has. It will adapt itself no matter what the circumstances are. As the autumn leaves surrounding me are brushed away, a time will soon come when the trees will again be filled with new hopes and dreams. The sun will shine bright again. A new season will bring forth the joys of awe inspiring beauty. The night-time sky will again open up its arms for anyone to embrace the wisdom of the glowing stars. And so like the process of nature, the years will pass by me and I will have new memories of my own to contemplate upon. Sometimes they will make me fall like the autumn leaves and sometimes they will lift me up from my slumber so that I may start again. Like nature, I will have to move on as well. Man can also adapt. Though like the trees, I may not have the capacity to forget my yesterday, but I can learn to take it with me wherever I may wish to proceed. My memories are a great source of power. Harnessing their power will surely make this long journey of mine, bearable. Man has a far greater ability to sail on the winds of tomorrow for a better future. And how successfully he travels through those waves will ultimately determine his final destination.

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