by Rita Chandler

Created on: September 19, 2010

Webster's New World Dictionary defines a flash as "to come or pass suddenly." Anyone who has experienced a hot flash will know that definition is not correct. And for those of you who don't know what a hot flash is - just wait women, your time is coming because hot flashes are a common symptom of menopause. 

Menopause is a natural even that normally occurs in women between the ages of 45 and 55. Such a small window for such a big change in a woman's life. I mean there is nothing "flashing" about something that may start several years prior to menopause, occur at night in the form of night sweats or several times during the day when intense heat encompasses your body, increases your heartbeat and causes the surface of your skin to become hot to the touch, especially the face. And a hot flash will occur at the most incovenient times.

All I need is to be in an important manly meeting (that's when everyone in your audience is a man), trying to demonstrate my intelligence and suddenly I become so hot I start fanning and flapping the collar of my blouse. The Mayo Clinic says these flashes usually last two minutes. Really? Who wrote that report? A man? My flashes last thirty minutes, if not longer, and then I have to take a fifteen minute break just to mop up the sweat and redo my makeup.   

I can say the flashes have reduced in frequency over the past several months but now I have insomnia to look forward to, another symptom of pre-menopause. Doctors say (men again, I'm sure) there are several steps women can take to avoid severe hot flashes.

Avoid caffeine, alcohol and spicy foods

Dress lightly and in layers

Take calcium and Vitamin D

Get plenty of exercise

Remain sexually active

Well you should have known that no matter the problem, sex is always recommended as a cure. (Men again) I am already grumpy because I haven't had my two cups of coffee for the day and my tex-mex lunch tasted bland without hot sauce; I have a sour taste in my mouth from the chalky taste of vitamins; my thighs and butt are sore from spinning classes but then I get home and my husband wants to have sex, "because the doctor says remaining sexually active will help avoid hot flashes." What do I say? Get out of here. I don't need sex. This is just a hot flash and we all know a flash will "come or pass suddenly."

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