by Bridget Webber

Created on: September 17, 2010

Accepting people for who they are can be tough when they don't live up to your expectations. Sometimes people you look up to and admire can disappoint you if they don't behave as you think they should, and such disappointment can make you feel disillusioned. It's human nature to form opinions about people and to imagine they are a certain 'type'. However, people can only be their true selves, despite the romantic image of them we all too eagerly create in our minds eye.

Understanding people and accepting them for who they really are can save you from disappointment and emotional pain. When you know someone well and have discovered they often behave in a way which is upsetting to you, it's best to learn how to rise above the disappointment by not expecting more from them than they're capable of giving.

When you accept people, warts and all, you are likely to be accepted as the fallible human being you are too. You will not only find that people understand you more and you them, but also that you stop expecting too much from yourself and being so self critical. Self acceptance is virtually impossible until you can apply such generosity to other people.

When someone you care for lets you down there's no point secretly sulking or holding a long term grudge against them. Simply accept what they can do well, and what they can't, and stop thinking they will change. This way you can move on when necessary and find the love and caring you need from people who are more capable, instead of waiting for the impossible.

It's often our close family or partner we expect a great deal from. We are capable of affording people we hold in high esteem with super human powers concerning morals and justice. When their behavior falls short of our expectations we can easily fall out with them, leaving our relationship damaged indefinitely.

People we could have have had strong bonds with for ever are likely to drift out of a damaged relationship, and if they don't we may push them aside ourselves until we are estranged from them. All this because they aren't as we think they should be. 

The emotional effort you put into feeling disappointed and unhappy with people for not behaving as you would like them to isn't worthwhile. Understanding where to expend and withdraw energy, and with whom, is a great life lesson. It can leave you feeling more at peace with the world and it's inhabitants.

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