by Elaine

Created on: September 15, 2010   Last Updated: September 17, 2010

How to Handle Getting Dumped

Oh, “Death, where is thy sting?” Getting dumped can feel like the end of the world; like life is over when love is lost.

Some say there's a contingency for how long it takes to heal after a breakup. Apparently, the time allotted is half the dating period. Within this rule, if two people date for a year, they must be “over” the relationship within six months. However, the heart is tender and should heal in its own time. In the meantime, the following steps are vital to the healing process. After all, there is light at the end of the tunnel.

1) Make a Plan

Time heals all. Setting short and long-term goals will replace old events with fresh, new memories. Planning an activity for a few months out will make the time seemingly go by faster. Then, you will have independent activities to look forward to without him or her. Also, minutes seem like forever in the beginning. If your days are packed with work, hobbies and fun activities, time will fly by.

The phone's silence may be deafening otherwise and you will feel accomplishment and a feeling of self-worth to replace the daunting feeling freshly weighing on your tender heart.  A plan with a “gift at the end” will motivate you on a daily basis. Get creative too with hobbies. You could write some of your best poetry or music during this tough time and discover hidden talents! Why stop now? Get your work published!

2) Make a Date

Call your friends and get out of the house! Go out and see a movie, hit the clubs, dance, see a good play or musical to take your mind off the situation. Keep in mind that as you hit the social scene solo, there is a great chance that you will meet people “out and about” who may be better suited to your socializing needs than the later companion. Being with true friends will remind you of how vibrant, alive, beautiful and worthy you are of positive companionship, laughter, and reminder of the good times ahead.

3) Spend Time with Family

This newly-found free time will give you a chance to reconnect with your family as “just you” rather than you within a couple scenario. You are your family's son/daughter, sister/brother and they truly care about you. Invite them over for dinner. Planning a meal for loved ones will spark the feeling of love in your heart again. Pouring into loved ones will help you redefine unconditional love of family. Perhaps it will be a reminder of your true emotional needs

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