by Colette Duval

Created on: September 14, 2010

' When written in Chinese, the word ' crisis' is composed of two characters- one represents danger, and the other represents opportunity.' (John F. Kennedy)
I am sure John F Kennedy wasn't specifically talking about a mid life crisis, yet the wisdom of this quote applies to any crisis one may face, be it public or personal. A mid life crisis is often mocked and seen as a cliche which befalls men and woman of a certain age who suddenly display uncharacteristic behaviour and develop notions considered ' childish ' or ' selfish' by others. Yet a mid life crisis is very real to those experiencing it and its effects can be felt like ripples in the water , affecting personal values and spreading out into family and relationships.

One can debate whether this crisis is ' real' , or whether it is nothing more than self indulgence , whether it happens to those who haven't quite grown up and experience a second kind of puberty,  but it is very real to those who suddenly find themselves in the throws of this crisis and who consequently  - somehow and to the best of their ability- have to deal with it.

I know, because I am living one. I am the cliche , I am the person filled with restless thoughts and nagging questions, I am the one who sees a cross road ahead and has to decide which way to turn. ' Left' points to all things familiar and safe, ' right' points to new opportunities and the sort of personal fulfillment that has eluded me so far.

I am both aware of the ' danger' aspect and the ' opportunity ' aspect of this crisis, Most of all though, I have decided to treat this period in my life as something that is happening for a reason and that, somewhere in the emotional turmoil , is a lesson to be learned. The danger lies in the temptation to act impulsively and get carried away by the sense of urgency to 'change' something, change myself, change circumstances before time runs out and I wonder what it could have been like....that ' other' life, the one I didn't have time to live. Why is this not a perfectly understandable thing to happen , especially in our fast paced culture which has it all mapped out for us from the beginning and doesn't give us much time to ask ' what do I really want and who am I ?'  We live to fulfill expectations which rarely sit in harmony with the ' real ' person and are taught to live for tomorrow rather than today.  Why then is it surprising that we are stopped in our tracks at a time when looking back becomes a sentimental

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