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Humor: Neighbors

by Cj Campbell

Created on: August 30, 2010

God Takes Care of Children and  Idiots

I live in a small town and in a very nice, quiet neighborhood.  The town only has one Minit Mart, no chain restaurants, no grocery stores and no place to shop.  I never dreamed I would ever live in a town this small, but twelve years ago, I made the move.   This town is so small, everybody knows everybody and most are kin to just about everyone here.  Although I have lived here for twelve years, I still don't know very many people.  I know the people I use to work with, my neighbors, the people at the bank,  people who work at the Minit Mart, and LP's family, but other than that, I don't know anybody.  But, it seems like everyone knows me.

A couple of months after I had moved here, I went to cast my vote on election day.  I was amazed at how short the line was because I had been use to waiting for an hour sometimes just to vote.  When I got there, I think there may have been three people in front of me.  I waited until it was my turn, then when I approached the lady sitting at the desk, I held out my identification.  I didn't know the lady and I still don't know who she is, but she smiled and said, "Oh; there's no need to show me that; I know who you are."  She pointed to my name on the list and said, "Just sign here."    It has been like that for twelve years; everybody knows me, but I don't know them.

I remember the first week after LP and I had moved into the house.  LP was working second shift, and I had an accounting job in a town about 35 miles from here.  After work one evening, my next door neighbor, Tom, came over and welcomed me to the neighborhood.  We talked for a couple of minutes and then he left.  Tom looked like he was in his mid-thirties and he had a wife and a small child.  All my neighbors seemed nice and although we were neighbors, we kept our distance.

Every day after work, I would come home; crank up the radio and work on getting the house in order.  We didn't have a lawn mower at the time, so we hired a neighborhood kid to mow the lawn.  I had noticed Tom's lawn was getting high, so I just assumed he didn't have a mower either.  After the kid had finished with our yard, I suggested that if he wanted to earn some extra money, he should go next door and ask Tom if he needed his yard mowed.  Evidently, Tom had a mower; he just hadn't used it in quite some time.  Two

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