by Lanita Cunningham

Created on: August 29, 2010

I pause in front of the mirror my reflection looking back, what exactly do I see?  A few strands of gray are now mixed in with my dark brown hair, a few lines have etched the skin around my eyes and lips, but somehow in my reflection I still can see the girl I was.  My brown eyes look back at me, the windows to my soul, does anyone else see what I see?

There’s still signs of that mischievous little girl filled with curiosity and wonder, as she rolled in the grass and looked up to the sky amazed at how large this world we live in is.  Climbing trees and catching fireflies on the warm summer nights, the sounds of crickets chirping and the distinct smell of the damp earth beneath my feet.  The world was mine to conquer, so innocent and naïve, so safe and secure.

There is a tinge of sadness, which I believe adds depth  and a bit of mystery to the brown eyes staring back.  Telltale signs of mistakes and poor decisions I made, dreams that never came true, loved ones I have lost.  No one is immune to the pain that life sometimes brings, but the big and little hurts in turn create the character within you.

There is still a sparkle when I smile, memories that have been built from my time on this earth, etched into my head;  all I need to do is close my eyes and let them race through my mind.  They bring a smile to my face or a tear to my eye, there is not a memory I have that I would be willing to let go of, the thought of letting any of them slip away saddens me.

I see the confidence in my lifted shoulders and head held high, confidence that comes with time, knowing that I have done the best that I can, making my way past the little stumbling blocks in the road of life.  Learning to pick myself up when I fall, to dust myself off and move on.

I look in the mirror and I am happy with what I see, I may not be physically beautiful but that does not matter to me.  I see a woman that has learned life lessons, that has grown from experience, a woman that has continued to live by the morals she was taught as a child.  I smile before turning away from the mirror, satisfied with being me.

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