by Ashok Kumar Gulla

Created on: August 22, 2010

As young couples enter into wedlock, they feel excited and jubilant and look forward for a loving and fruitful relationship. However, when two persons get married; they are ignorant about behavioral pattern of each other. Married couples generally prefer not to discuss various aspects of this intimate relationship with others; it is considered too personal. Hence, every new couple is not fully informed about emotional, psychological and physical aspirations of each other.

People often presume that after more time together with their spouse will improve understanding and love for each other. The human nature is not as simple. It takes long time to understand and adjust to the requirements of our spouse.  This requires sufficient efforts right from the beginning of relationship to avoid accumulation of negative feelings.

The fact that we have been tied together in marriage wedlock does not automatically bring love and respect for each other. As we go through the process of marriage, we often err in understanding and meeting the mutual aspirations. Our ignorance and laxity often spoils relationship, and what was expected to be a life long fruitful relationship between husband and wife turns out to be a pain. In latter years, couples often out of desperation curse the marriage. Some people take help of marriage counselors and psychiatrists to overcome stress from troubled marriage; however, the rout in marriage in no way seems to subsidize. This situation prevails with most married couples at varying degree of intensity. It makes us despondent and helpless to work for improving the relationship.

Expectation from marriage have gone up, as we wish to see in our life partner all those qualities, which we like in others with whom we have come in contact. Man like his life partner to be beautiful, intelligent, caring and professional. Similarly, woman expects her life partner to be handsome, educated, intelligent, wealthy and courageous. The level of expectation goes up as our demands from own life have gone up. We lay too much emphasis on success in various walks of life and built an image of a role model. We tend to compare our life mate with the image of role model. It is difficult to find one who meets all our expectations.

People often prefer not to reveal their anxieties, weakness, fears, troubles, aspirations and desires to someone who is not close. In married relation, just by being physically close does not mean that we feel comfortable to reveal entire

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