by Judy Merrill

Created on: August 10, 2010

The topic of death tended to strike fear into the hearts of those in my family.  As a child we were never taken to a funeral of any family member who passed away. 

This is not restricted to just my family, I am sure.  Look at the euphemisms we use for death: passed away, kicked the bucket, out of sight, etc.  We rarely, if ever, like to use the word, death.

Sometimes it is easier to intellectualize any subject rather than actually feel its impact.  Perhaps that is a part of the journey to the grieving process that follows the death of a loved one.

As a rational thinking adult I have come to the conclusion that the more we fear a subject, the more important it is to face the fear head on and learn all we can.  Religions have always taken the lead in this direction.  Although even in church services, death is spoken of in hushed and hallowed tones. 

As a matter of interest I was told by family members that Spiritualism concentrated on death.  As explained at the time, and what is not so readily understood, is that Spiritualism is the celebration of life.  The continuity of life, the proof of the afterlife, the continuity of the soul.

Spiritualism uses mediumship as communication and connection with the spirit realms.  Through this connection personal, uplifting and comforting messages are given to the grieving loved ones of those who have died.  And yet, most mediums do not really address death.  What they address in the continuity of the soul.  They are proving the continued life and existence of the human soul through mediumshiip.

The grieving process has some stages each must pass through.  These are not restricted to the death of a friend or loved one, they also apply to the death of experiences we have passed through in life. 

Seven Stages of Grief

1. SHOCK & DENIAL-

You will probably react to learning of the loss with numbed disbelief. You may deny the reality of the loss at some level, in order to avoid the pain. Shock provides emotional protection from being overwhelmed all at once. This may last for weeks.

2. PAIN & GUILT-

As the shock wears off, it is replaced with the suffering of unbelievable pain. Although excruciating and almost unbearable, it is important that you experience the pain fully, and not hide it, avoid it or escape from it with alcohol or drugs.

You may have guilty feelings or remorse over things you did or didn’t do with your loved one. Life

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