by Amanda Piper

Created on: March 02, 2007   Last Updated: November 02, 2011

It has been said that in a sexually healthy marriage, the sex will make up approximately 10% of the marriage. In a marriage that has sexual problems, the sex will become 90% of the marriage.

Children, finances, long hours or difficult work can all be stressful. Finding the time or energy for sex may seem impossible. A marriage that lacks regular love making can be filled with tension. The couple will feel disappointment, inadequacy, and possibly a loss of self esteem. If that wasn't enough strain on your marriage, thanks to the sexual revolution, we now have to fear our spouses will find what they want outside the marriage.

It would seem sex is no longer the sacred act between husband and wife it once was, but a rite of passage. There are rarely feelings involved, people want sex with no strings attached. No responsibility or expectations, it's all about the pleasure of the moment. Once that moment is gone, both parties are free to leave and never even see each other again.

Granted this was occurring prior to the sexual revolution, but since then it has become more widely accepted and thus, happening more frequently. The repercussions of this are teenage mothers, children born out of wedlock, single parenting, abortions, adoptions, child neglect and abuse, not to mention sexually transmitted diseases, at least one of which can be fatal.

Now young children are having sex because they feel it's acceptable. Men and women both are going outside their marriage to find sex more frequently or to find more exciting sex. Somewhere along the way, our society has failed to hold up the morals and values our grandparents and great grandparents followed.

Love making and sex are no longer the same thing. Making love is a way of sharing a deep emotional connection with your partner, whereas sex is a pleasurable activity that doesn't have to involve feelings. When one thinks of love making, one pictures a romantic scene with a husband and wife enfolded into each others arms, kissing and cuddling. Even in faithful marriages this doesn't happen as often as it should.

Due to images we've seen on television or in magazines, many people feel sex should be more exciting and physically rewarding. A spouse may encourage the other to try new techniques or positions they have heard of or read about. Some may even ask to act out a fantasy or role play.

Love making appears to be a thing of the past. Few couples are actually interested in the idea of making love. They want exciting, invigorating sex. They fail to realize love making renews a connection between a couple. You feel closer and more in love than ever. Sex may be physically rewarding, but love making offers an emotional reward that lingers long after the physical aspects have faded away.

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