by Priscilla Benfield

Created on: August 04, 2010

As we grow older and are faced with more challenges in life, often it becomes more difficult to remain positive. Between the stress of everyday life and unforeseen obstacles to achieving a goal, it can be easy to fall into a negative pattern. The problem is that once you get stuck in a rut of just trying to dodge every obstacle that lies in your path, you fall victim to it and getting out is hard. The good news is that it is not impossible to turn things around and the way to do that is by changing your attitude.

After falling into a negative pattern I became so worn down from the constant battles. Not that I sat around feeling sorry for myself, but I woke up each day ready for the fight. I expected the fight and so there always seemed to be something there waiting for me. It's great to be tough enough to handle whatever comes your way but the problem was that I was helping to create the drama.

I got so tired of living my own personal drama that it caused me to self-reflect. I think it was a comment that one of my friends made about hearing of my latest "tragedy" that really caused me to think. I dislike being pitied. It isn't who I am. I set out to change my life and decided living for the fight was not working. I have read many self-help books and I did believe that my strength was my power. There is much more to it than that. Your thoughts and your reactions are the true power. To test how much power I really did have, I decided to play a game with myself.

I made a promise to myself that I would wake up in the morning and tell myself that something good was going to happen today. No matter what came up during the day, I resisted the urge to panic and get defensive. Instead, I changed my way of seeing things. Looking on the bright side or seeing the glass as being half-full, really is powerful. After being stuck in a negative thought pattern for so long, it takes time and practice to break the bad habit. Practice makes perfect. I am not saying that I did not have moments where I relapsed but I forgave myself for slipping backwards.

After several days of this new practice, I reflected on how those days differed from the previous weeks. I felt better overall and the sense of living for the fight died down. Being strong is not a bad thing but constantly being ready to go to war is. Once I allowed myself to go with the flow of life and see things for what they really are, I was able to accept them in a new light. What once would have been upsetting to me was seen as an opportunity for change or personal growth. Obstacles are there for you to learn, grow and hopefully move forward on the road of life.

You can fight against things that you have no control over and all it will do is snowball into more fighting. Everything that happens can be seen in a positive or a negative way. You have the power over that. Once you begin the practice of seeing things in a more positive light, your world changes. Life becomes easier because you are not fighting against it. Going with the tide instead of trying to swim against it is far more relaxing.

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