by Mary Kelani

Created on: July 21, 2010   Last Updated: March 30, 2011

Relationships require work to keep them going, and it requires the two people involved to make them long lasting.  While it is easy to always blame the other person for bungling up what was once a perfectly good union, women sometimes set the path for destruction by making subtle yet deadly mistakes that may do harm in the long run.  Here are top ten picks that may cause chaos or even make a relationship go under:

Chasing Perfection: Women already know there is no perfect human being anywhere on earth, yet they perpetually seek the “perfect boyfriend” or “perfect husband.” If you do not like smokers, do not start a relationship with Jonas because he is six feet tall and has a shoulder the size of Atlantis; Be realistic in choosing a mate who is considerate, loving, and willing to go the extra length for you, even if his snoring is loud enough to wake a sleeping horse.  Snoring can be fixed, but picking you by the collar of your shirt and throwing you across the room may yield deadly results.

Nagging:  So what if he is an hour late from work? Do not greet him with a fight before finding out why he was late; if he did not call you, then maybe he did not want you to start the fight over the phone anyway.  Do not pick a fight over non-essential things that can be easily fixed. If you must complain, find a good time to do it and make him understand why you are upset. If you cannot express yourself and start acting crazy every time instead of talking civilly, chances are you are pushing him farther and farther away from you, which could damage the relationship.

Dependency:  A couple of weeks ago, a friend of mine casually informed me during a phone conversation that he was on his way to the mechanic to do an oil change on his daughter's car.  He was surprised when I asked why his daughter, who is nineteen years old and in her first year of college, could not go herself.  He replied that he had always done the oil change for everybody in the family. When this young lady gets married, what would she do if her husband could not take her car to the mechanic? Go complaining to her father? Women need to claim some independence in a relationship and learn to do some simple tasks themselves.  Learn how to change a light bulb, mow the lawn, or even fire up that grill. You garner more respect from him knowing that you can do it, not necessarily by you doing it.

Wall-Flying: What does a wall-fly do? Sits on

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