by Amy Hite

Created on: July 07, 2010   Last Updated: July 19, 2010

It is easy to imagine parenthood before you actually become a parent. You assume you will experience an angels singing, love at first sight feeling the minute you cradle your child in your arms for the first time. You also assume that lovely feeling will stick with you for the entire eighteen years you are legally responsible for parenting your little one. It all seems so easy until you flash forward ten years and find yourself in the middle of a public place with a screaming toddler.

Unlike adults, children do not have a mental social barrier that warns them to stop when they are pushing another person too far. Therefore, it is a parent’s responsibility to diffuse stressful situations and to find ways to calm down both parties. When you feel your child has pushed you past your limit, try the following techniques to get you through the stress of the moment.

-Remove the child from the situation.

Whether in a public place or at home, changing your child’s environment may stop a temper tantrum in its tracks. If your little one calms down, typically your stress levels will lower accordingly.

-Remove yourself from the situation.

Never underestimate the power of a time-out. Sometimes, adults need a time-out too. Walk away from the situation. Go to another room and count to ten. Escape to a closet and stand in the dark for a few seconds. Try anything to get away for a moment to bring your mind back to a peaceful level.

-Get to know your limits and your child’s limits.

The best way to get through a difficult moment with your child is to try to avoid it altogether. For example, do not push your child to do an afternoon activity when he or she generally naps at 2pm. Some outings are doomed to fail. Be realistic. Know your own moods and your child’s as well.

-Do not obsess over disciplining.

All children need to be disciplined from time to time. However, disciplining during a fit of anger typically does not benefit the child or the parent. Remaining calm is the key to being able to discipline logically and appropriately.

-Prepare for the stress.

You know you will encounter stressful times, and you will be better equipped to handle that stress if you have given yourself proper rest when things are not as hectic. Eat properly, get an appropriate amount of rest, and find ways to take time for yourself, even if it is just flipping through a magazine for 30 minutes, taking a quick afternoon walk, savoring a cup of morning coffee, or surfing the internet.

Parenting is one of the most rewarding experiences of life. Keeping things in perspective is the key to handling almost any situation with your child. Take a step back from life when you can and savor every moment - even the stressful ones.

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