by David Payne

Created on: July 06, 2010   Last Updated: July 12, 2010

That red mist descends sometimes in a slow vale, sometimes like a clap of unexpected thunder. For the majority of people it is no less difficult than trying to catch lightning in a bottle. That it is supremely difficult does not mean impossible, with a lot of effort you can indeed control your anger. At the very least change what was once a raging fire into nothing but smoke signals.

Breathing is a very important component in controlling yourself and your reactions. When you get angry and logic seems a distant friend you must breathe slowly and deeply. Its surprising how effective this technique can be as a first step in learning about your own demons. Say nothing, respond to nothing and just breathe. Within a very short time rational thought will return as the anger subsides. This can be very difficult to do at first but the results will speak for themselves.

As you breathe whilst silent and still, slowly consider your actions before you do them. Its the lack of thought that usually hurts someone either verbally or physically in these situations. These extra few seconds can mean the difference between losing a friendship or indeed your liberty to regaining control .

There is always someone important and special in our lives , picture them in the extreme moments. To think how a loved one would feel when you go over that emotional edge can truly stem your haste. Just a flash of them in your minds eye is like water to a fire.

Consider your diet in this complex equation. It has been proven that the wrong types of food can severely effect peoples moods. Most notably in the case of children. Evaluate your diet and if necessary change if only for a trail period to see if your mood alters. Everyone who eats a balanced diet will tell you how much more calm they feel. Simple things like drinking water instead of coffee will go a long way to leveling your moods. The caffeine in coffee does induce a sense of uneasiness and paranoia. Its addictive as well. The more you drink the worse your moods get. The less you sleep, the worse your mood gets. Its a vicious cycle and one that you must break. This is just an example and you should really check your entire diet to see if you do indeed have to much caffeine , sugar , e numbered foods etc.

Exercise the multipurpose tool we should all use on a daily basis. It is not just a benefit for your weight, your inner organs or your life expectancy. Exercise plain and simple makes you feel calm and relaxed. Tetchiness is replaced with serenity and patience. Incorporate activities into your everyday life and many of things that make you lose your cool will be tackled with mindful thought and logic. 

If all else fails the most simple method to not regret an outburst is to cut it off before it begins. Be aware of your own mood and remove yourself from the situation. Do not drive but walk, walk until you have totally calmed down. You will during this walk rationalize with yourself as your blood pressure drops. Even if you lose control and get very angry, try at some point to walk away. Its never black and white in life. So any improvement is welcome. If you can do it once, you can do it again.

Before long you will learn to walk before that volcano erupts. If you have a will, there is a way as detailed above. To want to be a better person is ticket enough to take this emotional journey.

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