by Del Lobo

Created on: July 04, 2010   Last Updated: July 05, 2010

You've been married for sometime and despite the fact that your love is still alive, the spark you had when dating seems to be diminishing.  Watch out! You don't want the sparks to stop feeding the flame do you?  Well then, some conscious action on your part needs to take place.

Gifts from a beloved husband do not always have to translate into big bucks. In fact, gifts for your sweet wife, do not even have to involve money at all.  A little bit of thought, creativity and work will go a long way.  First, find out what puts a smile on your wife's face.  She got off the phone talking to a girlfriend who went on a bike ride with her husband  She's telling you all about it, being animated and all.  Do you have two bikes?  Do you have someone who could look after the kids.  How about offering your wife two hours of kid-free bike-riding.  Oh yes, don't forget to stop for an icecream after and a moment of private intimacy.

I had lunch with a co-worker day after day and she talked about her marriage going sour.  She told me they had seen a counsellor twice and were keeping their fingers crossed that it may be a saviour.  One day, as she opened her lunch bag, she told me that her husband had packed her a lunch and we laughed, each of us wondering what could come out of it.  Out came a granola bar, a banana, a container with a piece of cheese and crackers and a vitamin bottle.  We looked at each other, eyebrows raised.  She opened the vitamin bottle and pulled out a folded note.  It read:

Dear Fiona

To make up for the lousy lunch, can I pick you up after work.  Would you like to eat dinner at the new cafe on Carden Street?  It serves sushi and I know you like that.  Mom has agreed to feed the boys and we don't have to be home until 8.  We'd have enough time to get to Silvercreek and pick up the shoes you've been meaning to buy.  And yes, it will not bend the budget.  I love you.  Dan

I couldn't even see Fiona's face as my eyes had teared up so much.  She reached over and we held each other's hands and Fiona prayed 'thank you for this gift'!  It was simple but sweet and enough of a spark to feed a flame.

Another story that sticks in my mind clearly about inexpensive but meaningful gifts is this one:  my neighbor Bea who had been married to Lionel forever often complained about how Lionel had become a curmudgeon in his advancing years.  She said every romantic bone in his body must be dissolving and decaying like his teeth.  We laughed at the analogy!  Well, she was wrong.  On her birthday, still in her pyjamas, she came running over to my house.  

'Look! look!'  She was holding a small, longish box in her hands.  I looked at her puzzled.

She told me that she had always wanted to learn the harmonica and talked about it many times in the past but had forgotten of late.  On this birthday, Lionel went off to get the paper and she was making her bed.  Under the pillow, she found a brand new blues harmonica in the note of 'C'!  The brown paper bag it came in, had scribbled all over it: 'happy birthday champ!'!  How sweet is that?

So, husbands out there, my feeling is that gifts do not necessary have to translate into large sums of money.  However, it if you can afford it, a cruise may be nice, if you think your wife likes that kind of travel.  Otherwise, pay close attention to what makes her happy.  

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