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Created on: February 28, 2007 Last Updated: January 08, 2008
No regrets
No regrets. That is one of the beliefs that guides my life I suppose. I don't regret anything that has happened to me and I don't regret any decisions that I have made. It is hard for people to accept this part of my personality. After all, those things that have happened in which others would regret later and wish would have not happened have molded me into the person I am today. That doesn't necessarily mean that I have enjoyed all that has happened to me either.
There are occurrences in a person's life that really change them. I mean, the choices we have made, the people we have encountered, the trials that we have been put through, gives us a perspective that guides our behavior from that moment on. We will react differently and choose more wisely after these things have happened.
Could I be able to be as emotional today if I had not gone through a difficult teen life? Could I be able to solve problems and build better if my grandpa had been alive longer? Could I be a better father if I did not have an excellent role model? Would I be less responsible if my parents had a little less hold over me? Would I have turned out to be a drug addict if I didn't turn down that one joint? Would I be more careless a driver if I had not been in that accident? These are the types of things that people ask themselves all the time. And why? Would you like to be a different person? Would you like to change yourself because of the choices you have made?
Well, lets put it this way. You make the choices you do because of the consequences of the choices you have already made. I have made some pretty irrational choices in my life that in hind sight I could have been hurt or something else worse could have happened. Ok, I will just say it. I have made some descision that was utterly stupid. But, looking back, I don't regret them. Back then the choices were harmless and I had support to help me get through. Now I have not support and the consequences are worse and more long lasting.
And as for the personality. . . I am the person I am today because of the pain that I have suffered. I am the person I am today because of the happiness that I have wallowed in. I am the person I am today because of the things that I have witnessed and learned from. I am the person I am today because of how I have seen the way in which someone reacts to how I have treated them. I would be a different person emotionally, spiritually, and mentally if I have not been treated and if I had not treat others the way that I have over my thirty some years.
I have been sorry for what I have done but not regretted. Those experiences made me who I am today and I don't waste my time on things that I can't change. I choose. I learn. I grow as a person. And I don't look back to wish for something that will never be. I will not have regrets.
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