by G. Emma Ryder

Created on: June 23, 2010   Last Updated: June 24, 2010

Being a good mother has nothing to do with being a working woman.  The goals that women set for ourselves dictates the lengths of our actions to be successful in our desires of home, family and life.  Each of us make decisions that carve out the path of our existence as well as our children and the beginning of their lives.  To be a mother staying home with our children, engaging them from the womb through to college is an ambitious goal.  This leads to well-adjusted children as far as home life and family but the child may suffer from the lack of exposure of the world they will find themselves part of one day.  The working woman elects to provide opportunities for her children to study dance, sports or lessons in music, engaging her children with experiences, people and learning the security issues necessary to provide a safe and wholesome environment, can make her child street wise and cynical.  None of these choices are less or more than another as far as making the woman a good or great mother.  It is a puzzle to find the right balance of nurture, support, security, love and freedom to allow the child to grow into a well-developed, independent personality and responsible adult that you aspire your child to be.

Truly good mothers balance their actions showing their children the careful thought process of decisions, actions and responsibilities of their choices and the problem solving skills to deal with what happens with bad choices or situations.  No one is perfect, it is how you deal with life and love gives your child the skills to grow up with a better understanding and skills to handle the ever-changing life we have in these difficult times.  

Good mothers create the feelings of family.  Whether in the lap of luxury or living in a box, a good mother must keep your child's sense of security, love and family togetherness.  Whatever comes against the family jeopardizes the feelings of each member of the family, a good mother will continue to provide the security even when there is none. This struggle will develop a bond between mother and child that will last a lifetime.  The lack of security may cause your family to pull apart. 

Single, divorced or married women working to provide for the family is a milestone of our culture.   At some point of time, it may have been a single or divorced woman were the only ones who lacked choices of working or not. But with economy causes and effect, the lack of choices has left us all working a full and sometimes and additional part time job to make ends meet.  A support team in place of a trusted friend, family or daycare worker can assist in maintaining the family effect that is required for a sense of well-being.  But taking nothing for granted remain interested in your child, asking questions and focus on their needs and security.    

The values of each one of us decides the completeness of our children and their education. Education is not limited to school but consists of experiences, people and opportunities.  Each of us choose the value of our ethics, morals and life experiences.  This we pass to our children but it is our children who will rebel and try new things and experiences testing our wisdom and values. They choose for themselves what values they embrace or discard.  This makes them that unique personality that you have in part created.   Having your undivided attention, love and discipline are the stuff of good mothers.

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