by Gabby Bugwadia

Created on: June 03, 2010   Last Updated: June 04, 2010

The early childhood years are the stepping stones for learning appropriate behavior. It is this brand of appropriate behavior which lays the foundation of all your child's future successes. When a child is rewarded immediately for appropriate behavior, it could set a positive chain reaction, motivating the child to continue to behave positively in future.

All children need to internalize the joys of their accomplishments; they need to be acknowledged and experience the good feelings of their success. It is therefore important for parents not to ignore or take for granted their child’s good behavior. Successful achievement of any task - be it the simplest activity, like learning how to dress or tie shoes or picture - reading or helping to set a table, calls for attention, affection and approbation from the parents.

Rewards can be anything from mild approval to joyous praise or even a small gift or payment for a good deed or a job well done. However, when rewards are given too freely or are too generous, it tends to convey to the child that the rewards elicit greater attention than the deed itself. It would therefore be a good idea to maintain a sense of balance and exercise some limits to the process of rewarding in everyday situations. 

Let us now examine T-H-R-E-E critical areas highlighting the importance of rewards for appropriate behavior:

1. Rewards as motivation

All children feel validated, motivated and happy by some kind of immediate reward. In the early childhood years, most children are thrilled to get a star or sticker for each accomplishment as a reward. They especially value the opportunity of getting to participate in some shared fun activity with their parents like having an evening out or spending a day at the zoo or helping mom to make popcorn or chocolate chip cookies. These timely immediate rewards trigger the child’s motivation and spur him on to move to the next level of achievement.

2. Rewards as reinforcement

Rewards reinforce the concept of repeating the cycle of behavior allowing the child’s intrinsic motivation to grow. When this is encouraged, it triggers additional successful experiences by way of reinforcement, as young children especially are keen on pleasing their parents. Incentives like an offer of extra privileges and freedom, extra play time or having a playmate come over the weekend, can all be important aids to reinforcing appropriate behavior like doing chores, feeding the pets, setting the table or watering the plants.

3.  Rewards as variables

Changing and rotating reward strategies periodically, sparks children's interest while helping them to understand and appreciate the level of their accomplishments. It enables children to get in touch with their inner needs and consistently leads them towards appropriate behavior. Some parents may choose to reward their kids with material items like toys, candies, books; while some others, offer an opportunity to go grocery shopping or on a family picnic to the lake or beach. Whatever the choice, it is fine as long as the rewards are meaningful and of distinct value.

Conclusion

The advantages of letting children know that parental recognition of good behavior could always be counted on is significantly huge. As long as adults make it a habit to recognize, reaffirm and reward appropriate behavior in early childhood, children will continue to thrive.

Sources: The Pre-School Child’s Learning Process by Edward Rosenberg & Silas Warner

Parenting with Purpose by Robert Reasoner and Marilyn Lane

Recipe for good parenting by Cheryl Saban

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