by T.C Leonard

Created on: May 30, 2010

"Live...Even if it Kills You"

I began my slouch

Upon the couch

In a most familiar way...

A couple Cokes,

A pack of smokes,

And a snack from Frito-Lay

With TV shows

To end my woes

And a horrid day of toil...

'twas my routine-

Although obscene-

'til they put me in the soil

But on this night,

To my delight,

I found an infomercial

A talking head,

Whose hair was red,

Introduced himself as Herschel...

"We have SARS

And men from mars

A-knockin' on the gate,

But, my friends,

A colon cleanse

Will set your world straight!

"Dump that drink

Out in the sink!

Or else I'll hedge my bets-

Let not those chips

Cross your lips...

And toss those cigarettes!"

I sat up straight

Was it too late?

Was I a goner then already?

I made a vow

To eat no cow

And toss out that spaghetti

I became aware,

Had cause for care

In my desperate situation

What could I do?

Ah, yes, I knew...

I simply changed the station!

I found a dude-

"Man Versus Food"-

Who had a plan, much better

He overeats,

Partakes of sweets,

Lives my life-to the letter

I look like Yoda,

Enjoy my soda,

Never said I was a winner

Yes, I'm unfit

But, please, admit

That I had a lovely dinner

So, when in doubt

Never pout

When a con-man says you're dying

Taste no defeat

When you eat red meat...

There's a good chance that he's lying

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