by Carmel Brulez

Created on: May 25, 2010

Dating sites have loads of advantages and selling points, but there are downsides to them, as there are with everything.   Because you are giving out information to strangers who might speak to you or meet you one day  you need to be wary of predators.  Predators come in all shapes and sizes and can appear very friendly, caring, polite and respectable,  they need to because otherwise they would have no chance of being successful.  So what sort of predators can we find on dating sites?

Men or women who have young children need to beware of pedeophiles.   The pedeophile may be purporting to seek a man or a woman who is middle aged, married or divorced, separated or widowed, and say all of the right things that back this up, but they may actually be interested in you more because of your child(ren) than because of you.   There are a lot of cases of people, usually women, who have met someone off of a dating site only to find that their new partner is not really interested in them sexually,  or just goes through the motions with them when they cannot avoid it, or so as not to arouse suspicion, but is trying it on with or grooming their children behind their back.

Older people who have a successful business or a very well paid job, or have recently inherited money or won the pools should beware of making it too obvious on their profile or during chat that they are very solvent,  in case they entice gold diggers and spongers.  By all means be honest and do not pretend to be poor, as this backfires in other ways,  but do not put all of the detail or only give this information when you know you are speaking to someone you are very interested in and who you know has as much to offer as you.

Everyone on dating sites, particularly women, have to beware of pepole who are only after casual sex but pretend they want a proper relationship.  They may be married and pretending to be single, or living with someone and pretending to be single, or simply pretending they want a serious relationship when they do not.

Another thing everyone should beware of on dating sites is those who tell you they are desperate for money because they are running a charity, or they have lots of bills they cannot pay,  or they need the money so that they can pay for their fare to travel to you.  Never give anyone you do not know properly money, no matter what they say.   Why would you want a partner who cannot pay their own way anyway? This person will either rob you or keep sponging off of you.

Con artists often get their victims from dating sites.  They send them word perfect loving messages, show them a fantastic photo and convince them they are their soul mate.  Then they either get money from them from a distance or meet them and sponge off of them. This usually goes on until the victim has run out of money or gets very suspicious and then finds out their "partner" has done this many times before.

Always be careful about giving out your email address, insist on chatting to them through the site where you can remain anonymous,  never give out your phone number until you are sure you want to speak to them and even then get their number and check it before you give yours.  Be wary of anyone who says you cannot phone them at home or you can only ring them on a mobile. Either they are married or living with someone, or they have a very busy life where they do not really have time for a relationship.  

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