by Rebecca Thomas

Created on: May 19, 2010

It is always advisable for your spouse to share caring for your elderly parents especially when this responsibility has fallen onto your shoulders.  It is almost impossible for you to do this on your own.  Your spouse must understand that you need him to work with you on this.  More so, if the health of your elderly parents is deteriorating.  If not, it will be difficult to maintain the peace in your family.  It also can affect the stability of your marriage and the well- being of your children.

Your elderly parents feel very affected and concerned if your spouse displays an uncaring attitude towards them.  If they are living with you, then they would consider leaving your home and find solace under an alternative shelter.  If they are living in their own home, they would not want to see your spouse if they can help it.  They want to avoid putting on a mask.  You are then caught in between not knowing how to handle the situation which can turn bitter.  Your relationship with either party is at stake.

Your spouse should set a good example for your children.  Caring for your elderly parents is part of role-modelling and leadership.  Your children will eventually pick after your spouse's attitudes towards your elderly parents.  Your spouse should not forget that one day he is going to be old as well.  Your children will reflect all that they have witnessed during their young time and act accordingly towards him.  What goes around comes around!

Your parents can never be replaced unlike your spouse, if you can help it.  This is the only time that you have with them.  It is good that both of you come into terms of agreement prior to marriage.  It is detrimental to enter into marriage without first discussing this matter.  You know that you are going to be in a miserable state even if your spouse is the best thing that has happened in your life.  You do not want to end up wrecking your relationship with your spouse just because of your elderly parents.  There must be a give and take policy practised in terms of time and resources.  Discussions must continue throughout as change becomes necessary to suit the phase of marriage life you are in.  There are times you may need to be unkind in order to be kind to either one party.  However please make it clear to them why you had to make such a decision.

The care your spouse shows to your elderly parents

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>