by Daniel Owen

Created on: May 19, 2010

As I finished watching Leap Year with my Sis the other night I was once again struck by the fact of the dilemma of someone settling with what is comfortable and available over something their soul needs.  Of course the obvious reason is time.  

If this is all there is, and there is no creator, and I am not inherently loved, then it is up to me entirely to manage my life.  A great job, trophy wife, modeling contract, 5-year plan, new car lease, 2 kids, private school, etc.  I have to judge myself according to the best standard I can define.

If Jesus truly does love me and did die for me and paid for all my sins and my idiot behavior and has me in the palm of his hand I can relax, trust his goodness and just live life.  What do we have to offer anyone if we are always striving?

As the movie ended and I said goodnight to Sis, I laid down on the living room floor with my hands behind my head and started praying.  I had never prayed anything this specific before.  I was already feeling liberated before the first words were out of my mouth.  

I reflected back to only two people I could remember who I felt I ever had any soul connection with in my life.  Of course, like everyone else, I have liked women who never liked me, and the reverse was also true.  

The first was a young lady I met at Starbucks who actually introduced herself to me while I was reading and asked if she could sit with me.  I spent time with her conversing and reading over a period of only five or six times.  It was magical in that it was effortless.  Yet, it was not mutual.  She admired me, I know that, but she was tied down to many a man and we just differed too much when it came down to the gritty stuff.

The second was precarious.  She was a young lady who was a friend of a friend of my niece's who was with a group of us that I was chaperoning at Astroworld, a theme park in Houston, TX.  She was too young, but there was a connection that was there that was undeniable.  I did everything possible to stay away without being rude, and the Lord was merciful.  She did everything she could to stay near me.  I kept praying.

The day ended as soon as it began, and the memory of her faded after a month.  It is near ten years later now, and I recalled this after the movie.

Looking at the ceiling, I prayed that if that meeting and what I perceived as real connection was truly real that the Lord would reintroduce her to me within the next week.  I laid the fleece out just like Gideon did in the Bible.  I also told the Lord that after the next Friday I would leave it with Him and not mention it anymore.

What liberation in knowing that someone really does love me more than anyone else and always will.  I can leave all the uncertainties with him, because he is God Almighty.  So, there are three days left till the fleece comes back.

Here's to souls mating.

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