by Janeal Mulaney

Created on: May 08, 2010   Last Updated: May 11, 2010

Should I Forgive and Forget

I honestly don’t know one person that has not hurt someone at one point in his or her life. Except for Jesus, and he died on the cross for all our sins.

There are times when you may not forget the hurt that someone has put a loved one through or even yourself, but I believe we should all forgive. It is hard, at times, but one of the wisest people I know, said these words to me once.

‘We can chose not to forgive others, but who do we really hurt when we don’t forgive them. They still go on their way, they live, they breathe, they laugh, they play, and you are probably whom they are laughing at, because you are the one that holds yourself back from having a good time. You are the one that is being eaten alive with your hate for them.’

I’ve thought about that saying many times, over the years, and through watching others, who would not forgive someone they felt had done them wrong. They are on the outside looking in. They are the ones who miss out on what life can truly be.

This doesn’t mean you have to forget their words of hurt or the pain they’ve caused you or someone you loved. It means without forgiving that person whether you do it privately or tell them face-to-face your anger and your resentment of them will only hurt you in the long run.

There have been many friends, family members, and some acquaintances that have hurt me throughout the years. I still get mad, I tell them what I think and how I feel, then I calm down and forgive them for the pain they have caused me.

I don’t remember all of what they did or even what all I said afterwards. I let it go, I try not to remember any of it for it does me no good to think about the hurt or the words that was said.

I also know there are people out there who have been hurt far worse then I can ever even imagine being hurt. So me telling them, they need to forgive someone who has killed or hurt someone they love in some form or another, seems ignorant to me, for feelings are something I can’t possibly understand.

For those people all I can say is I still feel forgiveness is the first step towards healing, but it will be a much longer road then I have ever had to travel to find the peace within.

For the people out there that have hurt someone, with words or actions, intentionally or unintentionally, learn to ask for their forgiveness. Whether they forgive you or not, at least you tried to make a bad situation better.

It is always best to forgive, and put the pain aside, so you too can live, breathe, laugh and play, without the pain of seeing that person each day.

Bitterness, hate, hurt, and judgment toward others, only hurts you in the long run. In some way or some day they will pay for the hurt they have done to you, whether it is Karma, or by the Lord’s hand. You may never know how or when it happens, but we all wind up paying for our own sins against each other in our own time.

Forgiveness is divine, only God has the right to judge each person.

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