by Amanda Pridgen

Created on: May 07, 2010

Overcome with stress.

No wonder my life is such a mess.

I hide my true feelings well.

To look at me you couldn’t even tell.

Screaming so loudly on the inside.

Just trying to keep it together on the outside.

So much thinking about my life.

Wondering why I have to go through all this strife.

Feeling not good enough.

By my appearance you would think I was nothing but tough.

Truthfully my emotions are crumbling.

Realizing when I start to walk, I begin to stumble.

How many times can one stumble before they fall?

With no one to catch me it becomes hard to stand tall.

Many nights of useless conversations.

Same mistake over and over without any hesitations.

Not acknowledging the problem will not make disappear.

The problems get bigger always to reappear.

What was once kept inside?

Is beginning to show effect on the outside.

For once in my life I thought I chose the right road.

Only to find out I now have to carry a heavy load.

I have a sense of being but stuck in limbo not knowing where to go.

I only wanted to make our life better; this I want you to know.

I have the strength deep down to choose right.

Trying to find it again has become such a fight.

Tired of giving my all.

To watch all my hard work fall.

I have to dig deep inside to find that strength I once had.

Then finally I won’t be so sad.

I want my children to grow up proud to have a mother like me.

I am doing the best mother I can be.

Pushing myself more than I know I should.

If I knew another way I would.

However, god will provide and take care.

Faith I have he will take care of the family I share.

Now I have to allow myself to let go of everything bad I feel.

Then with the help of god I will begin to heal.

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