by Margaret Radisich Sleasman

Created on: May 02, 2010

We spend a good portion of our lives in one check-out line or another so we may as well make good use of our time.  I tried bringing a book, but there is no way a person can concentrate on reading with all that is going on; so now I just observe the other people.

My dog ran out of dry food, not his fault I could see it was getting low; nevertheless I waited until Sunday afternoon to replenish his supply.  I decided to make a run to Wal-Mart since I could save a of couple dollars; believe me Wal-Mart on a Sunday afternoon is no place to be.  I thought, “Since I am here I will get a case of pop and a couple cards.”  I then move to the quick checkout line with my four things, this line is 25 people long, so I move over to the 20 items or less.  It was long, but certainly shorter than the 10 items or less line.

Once settled in line I glanced around and realized that I was the only normal person in the store; this was particularly unsettling because I know that I am not totally normal to begin with.  I was getting worried as to just how much more un-normal these people are than me when I noticed a young father teasing his baby with a rubber snake.  The baby was too young to care, but apparently hungry; so every time the dad would try to push the snake to the baby’s nose the baby tried to suck.  The dad (who I am sure was not over 15 years old) thought he was so clever and announced how much fun he was having with weird laughing sounds.  Just then the mother (who I am sure was way over 30) stopped unloading the cart, went over and kicked him.  He spent the remainder of their checkout experience groveling on the floor and when “the lady” was done, she grabbed him by the collar and pushed him out the door.  A marriage made in heaven, that one.

There was a shorter line on the other side of me and a lady stepped in with one roll of scotch tape; immediately seven people pulled in behind her.  As the scotch-tape lady moved to the front of the line, she waved her husband into the line with her who had an overflowing cart.  Oblivious to the disdain of the people behind her, she announced, “What am I going to do with him, he just can’t keep up with me.”  I am wondering why she didn’t get shot as there were several in line who looked like they could have been carrying.

Glancing about, I stopped short at some teens who were trying to look cool with their funny clothes and ipods.  A favorite song must have hit their ears because they started to jump up and down, gyrating like they had gerbils in their pants, or maybe they did, one can never be sure about teens now days. 

When I finally took my turn at the check stand the checker glared and said, “You could have bought more, this line is 20 items or less.”  I told her as nice as I could that I didn’t need anything else and her line provided the best entertainment value for my money.  She threatened to call security so I quickly paid and left.

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